Witch Hunt or Awakening? Thoughts on the Globes.

oprah

At this year’s Golden Globes, both women and men in attendance dressed in black to signify what actress Amber Tamblyn called “an awakening”. And perhaps in some ways it was. As the New York Times explains, “[the Hollywood establishment] used the Globes to insist that it would reform itself– that the harassment of women would no longer be tolerated, that the culture of silence that aided and abetted men like Mr. Weinstein was over, that women and men would be paid equally.” Television series and films about women, including “Big Little Lies” and “Lady Bird” were recognized, as were some female actresses (Nicole Kidman and Frances McDormand). And Oprah won the Cecil B. Demille award giving a stirring speech that brought many to their feet as she declared “Their time is up!”.  

 

Then Natalie Portman announced the all-male nominees for Best Director, underscoring the hypocrisy of an award show and industry that does not treat men and women equally despite recent promises to do better. Wearing black to the Globes was meant to draw attention to sexual harassment, assault and discrimination in Hollywood and beyond; some men even wore “Time’s Up” pins to adorn their black tuxes. Yet, on the red carpet, it was the women who were questioned about their personal experience with sexual harassment while men were interviewed about their recent professional accomplishments. On stage, female award winners used their moment of recognition as a platform to celebrate other women and drive home the intended message of the night: Women in Hollywood and beyond deserve parity and respect. Male Globe winners, by contrast, fell largely silent. Indeed Seth Meyers was the only man to openly address the issues of the night including calling out offenders like Harvey Weinstein and Kevin Spacey.

 

That many of the male award winners failed to verbally address the culture of sexual harassment in Hollywood that their outfits were intended to call out and cultivate change around, denotes a kind of insincerity–whether intended or not–when it comes to the conversation around sexual harassment, assault and discrimination. How can we create real and lasting change if men are either afraid, uncomfortable, or unwilling to speak openly about it?

 

Of course not all men are silent on these issues and the ones who have spoken out should be encouraged to take further action in the #timesup movement. Nonetheless, it is disheartening to see men like Justin Timberlake, dressed in black and a “Time’s Up” pin at the Globes, speak about his work with Woody Allen as a “dream come true” when Woody Allen’s adopted daughter, Dylan Farrow, has long accused him of sexually assaulting her when she was seven. Despite the fact that Allen has denied her allegations and was never convicted, Farrow has maintained he assaulted her. In light of the #metoo movement, women in Hollywood are asserting their belief in Farrow’s story and, more importantly, some have vowed never to work with Woody Allen again. Mira Sorvino, Greta Gerwig and Rebecca Hall are among the most recent group of women to have apologized for working with him.

 

But, as Chitra Ramaswamy points out, the same cannot be said for men. Jude Law, for example, is currently filming one of Allen’s movies and has yet to say anything on the matter (interestingly the plot involves the pursuit of a 15-year-old girl by a middle aged man, but as Richard Morgan explains, that’s pretty much Allen’s MO). Just yesterday Alec Baldwin referred to working with Allen as one of the “privileges of his career” and criticized stars who have spoken out against the film-maker even as Timothee Chalamet, Rebecca Hall and Griffin Newman–all stars in the “A Rainy Day in New York” film– have said they will donate their earnings from the film to charities aimed at combating sexual harassment and assault and regret working with Allen.

 

And this where tangible actions must be recognized and commended and where hypocrisy and insincerity must also be called out. To say you are part of a movement, to say you believe “their time is up”, to say you are a feminist, to say that you don’t tolerate sexual harassment is not enough. Words are no longer enough. You cannot proclaim your #metoo story and then turn around and work with a filmmaker like Woody Allen. Or at least you shouldn’t. And you cannot insist you’re a feminist and then in private repeatedly force sexual contact on someone (see the original story about Aziz Ansari in Babe here). And that is the whole point of #timesup. You don’t have the right to wear a pin or be part of the cause if you are living a lifestyle that appears to condone inappropriate behavior on your part or on the part of others. And this applies to men and women. In Hollywood particularly, both men and women can be more selective about the directors, producers, cast members, etc. that they work with. As for the Hollywood establishment? It’s time to start better recognizing the work of female and minority talent in Hollywood. After all, putting an end to sexual harassment and assault begins with recognizing gender biases and systematic discrimination built into the industry and society, more broadly. Most men aren’t rapists. And there is a difference between groping a woman and asking her out for a drink. It’s called respect and pretty straightforward. 

So no, this isn’t a witch hunt. It’s an awakening and their time is up.

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Body Image and Social Media

Body Image

This week we wanted to look at body image issues for both young men and young women and synthesize some of the resources out there on the topic.

We should begin by acknowledging the rather obvious fact that both boys and girls, men and women struggle with body image. As current research has shown, mass media and social media play a key role in shaping what children and young adults believe is both the desired and attainable male or female form. For young men, they often feel scrawny and seek to build muscle by maintaining a rigorous workout schedule and diet plan, while supplementing with steroids. For young women, rather than bulking up, the goal is to slim down by using diet products including laxatives.

In an article for the New York Times, Perri Klass references the Growing Up Today Study (GUTS) which surveyed children age 9 to 14 periodically over the years as they grew up. The study found that by the age of 23 to 25, 10.5% of women surveyed had reported using laxatives to aid in weight loss over the past year. Similarly, 12% of men in the study reported using muscle building products. Because the use of these products increase with age, the study points to the “need for early intervention”. For example, parents should speak to their children about body image and the kinds of images they see on social media from a young age. By asking, “What do you think of that picture?” or “Who is that picture for?”, parents can help their children to be critical consumers not only of the broader media, but also of friends’ images on social media.

Lisa Damour explains that questions like these are particularly important given the widespread use of social media platforms like Instagram where teens may post “carefully crafted bikini shots” year round. For her, it’s not so much that young girls are comparing themselves to Victoria Secret models, it’s that they are comparing their bodies to those of their friends and acquaintances. Damour explains that in practice, this behavior is a “tax on their concentration”. Findings from a study conducted in 1998 appear to corroborate this point. Researches put both male and female undergraduates in their own dressing room with a mirror and either sweaters or swimsuits in various sizes. The participants were told to put on their garments and wear them around the dressing room awhile before filling out a fake form to evaluate the apparel. While they were waiting, they were given a maths test to use their productively. The researchers found that the female students wearing sweaters performed much better than their swimsuit-wearing female counterparts, while male students performed the same whether in a swimsuit or sweater. A second study swapped the maths test for an exam that sought to determine “the capacity for focused attention” and still the results held. Their conclusion?

In short, when women are prompted to reflect on their physical appearance, they seem to lose intellectual focus.

While men may not suffer a loss of concentration, Scott Griffiths argues body image and the portrayal of the male figure in the media (and social media) is still taking a calculable toll men. Why? Griffiths explains,

Boys, just like girls, are influenced by the images they see… As society places increasing value on those aspects of physical appearance that can be modified through diet and exercise, whether it’s body fat or muscle or some new combination thereof, we create the environment in which eating disorders can flourish.

Females want to get skinnier. Males want get bigger. So many young men and adults turn to muscle builders like anabolic steroids to try and achieve the kind of increased muscularity they see in movies, on models, in social media. But like anorexia or any other eating disorder, Griffiths explains “muscle dysmorphia” is a real mental disorder where individuals who suffer spend an average of 5.5+ hours per day thinking about their muscles and body size. They might protect their diet and training schedule by turning down important social occasions. Feelings of insecurity or shame about their body may take over completely. And perhaps most troubling, fully half of those with muscle dysmorphia have reported attempting to commit suicide at least once.

For both male and female children, it is imperative that parents set an example by celebrating their children not for what they look like, but for what they can do and achieve. Be similarly critical of the objectification of women in the media and the characterization of men as stoic and uncaring about their appearance.

For Jessi Kneeland, it was the constant objectification and sexualization of her body by men that lead her to associate her body with danger. After she was sexually assaulted twice at the age of 7 and 9, endured sexually charged “compliments” like, “you’re jail bait” at the age of 11, and suffered through an unhealthy relationship as a teen, Kneeland explains that she simply saw herself as “the kind of girl you violate”. Which is why she argues:

Negative body image isn’t just about body, it’s about personal and cultural factors, it’s about shame or the feeling that there is something wrong with us.

While social media may serve to reinforce these feelings in many ways, social media itself has given rise to the body positive community which preaches self love and advocates for feeling proud of and secure in you body. While Kneeland admits this is a step in the right direction, body positivity doesn’t offer a lasting solution for someone with a negative self image. Why? Because according to her, it’s not about how skinny you or how muscular you want to be. The physical “flaws” that we choose to obsess over are really masking something much deeper. Perhaps it’s the fear of being judged or made fun of. Maybe it’s the fear of being unloved and ignored.

The problem isn’t with our bodies. It is with the stories we believe about ourselves that we believe our bodies are broadcasting to the world.”

Social media allows children and adults alike to create content and share it with the masses. Photo sharing platforms in particular, have a direct influence on our perception of ourselves and our bodies. They invite us to make comparisons, to critique, to judge, to fall prey to photoshopped and perfected images. In some cases, more positively, they may invite us to celebrate what we most cherish about ourselves. Regardless, it is our responsibility to consume media critically and to assist children in doing the same. Moreover, as Kneeland reminds us, our self-image is multidimensional, the product of more than just unrealistic fashion adverts. We must also strive to understand the emotions and thoughts and experiences from which the insecurity and negative body image originates.

#RAPstories

RAP STORIES II

What is your story?

A LOT of attention has been paid to sexual harassment as of late. We have heard about extensive sexual harassment in the workplace, sexual harassment on college campuses, sexual harassment perpetrated by adults against children.

Less discussed is the growing issue of sexual harassment among children or peer-on-peer sexual harassment as we have termed it.


The aim of the #RAPstories Campaign is to promote awareness of peer-on-peer sexual harassment in schools, at parties, in sports or while abroad. We want young people to be able to define, identify and respond with confidence to sexual harassment.

Rather than be bystanders, we want to empower young people to #SpreadRespect by speaking out. We want to share your #RAPstories.


But first, let’s define sexual harassment.

According to Citizens Advice, sexual harassment is unwanted behavior of a sexual nature which:

  • violates your dignity
  • makes you feel intimidated, degraded or humiliated
  • creates a hostile or offensive environment

Sexual harassment can be nonphysical:

  • sexual comments or jokes, gestures or requests for sexual acts
  • displaying pictures, photos or drawings of a sexual nature
  • sending texts or emails with unwanted sexual content
  • spreading sexual rumors about someone

Sexual harassment can also, of course, be physical:

  • Unwanted touching including hugging, kissing and other unwanted sexual advances

If you have personally experienced this kind of behavior, or have witnessed the sexual harassment of one or more of your peers, we want to hear from you.

We want to know what sexual harassment looks like to you. 

Maybe you heard a rape joke at school that made you uncomfortable. Maybe you helped spread a sexual rumor about someone. Maybe your friend showed your an inappropriate photo of someone at school.

How did it make you feel? What did you do about? If you could go back in time, would you respond differently now?

Worried about speaking up? 

Don’t be. When you email us at info@therapproject.co.uk or DM us on our facebook or instagram pages, we will ask you whether you would like us to share your story on our social media platforms. You can choose to share your story anonymously or with your first name and age attached. Our aim is simply to spread awareness about peer-on-peer sexual harassment and you can help us do that.

Use the hashtags #RAPstories and #SpreadRespect to help us have a conversation about peer-on-peer sexual harassment.